dating a "quirky" girl

  • Objavljeno Pred 6 meseci

    Alex Meyers

    Trajanje: 10:47

    a video essay featuring my random thoughts after water Stargirl on Disney+, among other movies.
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Alex Meyers
Alex Meyers

thanks for watching everybody. Given current events, it felt weird to just sit here and make jokes about Disney Channel movies or whatever, so I wanted to do something a little more serious (but not too serious, I mean this is ME after all). I don't do video essays too often, so some of you may have never seen one of mine. On Youtube, most video essays are really just like fancy wikipedia articles or college thesis papers. But with mine I like to make them more personal, more about my experiences and opinions, rather than like "look at how many big words I can use". In this video, I use the words "quirky" and "manic pixie dream girl" somewhat interchangeably. This is technically not correct, but I wanted to focus more on my experience with these kinds of people, rather than a dissertation about the trope itself and how it manifests in different kinds of media over time or whatever. Like I mentioned in the video, I was REALLY into the idea of the MPDG back when I was in High School, so it was interesting for me to think back on why that was, and why I can't stand them now. And again, as I touched on in the video, these roles of "sad boy" and "MPDG" can easily be reversed. But, at least in movies and tv shows, the trope is overwhelmingly portrayed in the way I talk about in the video. The MPDG doesn't really exist in real life, but I have met more than a few girls (and guys too) who, either on purpose or by happenstance, are emulating one. I used to think dating these girls would be a dream come true. I was wrong. It was agony.

Pred 6 meseci
Alister Wednesday
Alister Wednesday

This made me really sad thinking that I might be this person...but I’m real...I can’t disappear from my shitty self...🥺 I’ve been having a lot of deeper conversations and thoughts lately...I don’t like it. I like being ignorantly happy.

Pred 21 uro
HetLedie
HetLedie

Yo Alex I agree with you homie dating these type of Girls is on nightmare I was with one for only a few months she literally cheated on her me with her ex the day after we broke up

Pred dnevom
Angela Mae Viloria
Angela Mae Viloria

bro, who hurt u?

Pred 5 dnevi
Kate Maxon
Kate Maxon

Okay so what is that movie with the girl in the red overalls and a hat????

Pred 26 dnevi
Mayela Garcia Salazar
Mayela Garcia Salazar

Hi alex love your vids always makes me laugh and this video wasn't like most like you said but it was still good to watch. :)

Pred mesecem
Miguel
Miguel

I appreciated you looking at an example of a fantasy boy and pointing out how in those stories it's still that the girl fixes the boy.

Pred 6 minutami
Potato Gym
Potato Gym

This is basically sweet November at its core

Pred 3 urami
Ace Q
Ace Q

There also seems to be some sort of manic pixie dream.. guy? I would reference Stan from I Am Not Okay With Thus

Pred 4 urami
Lonnie M
Lonnie M

men legit MADE the manic pixie girl character and then they target women to shame against it....

Pred 6 urami
Call Me Jude
Call Me Jude

I loved stargirl as a kid; the book. The movie broke my heart. I didnt care for it at ALL

Pred 7 urami
Katrina's World
Katrina's World

Yay stargirl

Pred 9 urami
Jesse Kozemczak
Jesse Kozemczak

for me, joseph gordon-levitt will always be tommy from 3rd rock from the sun. i can't take him seriously in anything else

Pred 11 urami
Sugar Z Blossom
Sugar Z Blossom

I don't watch highschool romance because they're too awkward and realistic or maybe too unrealistic for me I fell more embarrassed and cringeworthy when the characters get into awkward situations than when I do in real life

Pred 16 urami
Jazzel Espinas Remetio
Jazzel Espinas Remetio

There should be a perspective where instead of attacking the manic pixie dream girl of being herself, it should dive into the topic of no one actually knowing who she is? In 500 days of summer, sad boy whose name I can't bother to remember just liked the superficial things about her. Similar to star girl where there was really no effort on the boy's part to chase after her. She appears impulsive and unique but at the same time, aloof. There must be a reason to this--- but no move or video essay ever dived into that idea because all that matters is that sad boy feels better about himself. I wonder if there is a video unwrapping the sad truth of how a manic pixie dream girl functions. She doesn't seem like a selfish character who doesn't think much of her actions but actually a character whose function revolves around giving a boy a purpose and leaving him to not give him a burden of maintaining a relationship. I hope there will be a video depicting manic pixie dream girl as not just as a male fantasy or a makeshift unexpected antagonist that this video makes her out to be... but to find the reasons why she does the things that she does and how she feels afterward in leaving the sad boy... It's sad how this trope has been a subject of ridicule.

Pred 17 urami
Rowan Day
Rowan Day

The male fantasy is a manic pixie dream girl who comes into his life, fixed his problems, and leaves. Huge problem with this? I fit the antic pixie dream girl stereotype in a lot of ways, being quirky and upbeat and fun and also willing to do a lot of emotional labor and fix things... but then I’m like “hey can we have a real committed relationship” and guys are like “uh, no, I’m just here for the free sex and therapy” It’s not fair and it’s not okay, and the sad boy, is also incredibly selfish irl. I know my actions have consequences. I want my actions to mean something to you. I want to mean something to you. I’m not here to fix you for your own sake, I want both of us to fix ourselves or at least work on ourselves for each other’s sakes. Goddamn

Pred 19 urami
Winter Forest
Winter Forest

I feel like eternal sunshine of the spotless mind is a more realistic portrayal of a quirky "girl" & a destruction of the manic pixie dream girl stereotype.

Pred 19 urami
Alister Wednesday
Alister Wednesday

Shit...I’ve been told I’m an aloof “dream girl” several times quirky spontaneous all of that....does that mean I’m selfish? I feel like I usually end up screwing up a relationship....fuck...even what this guy said...”does she want to be with me today?” ....do I...suck? Am I...a bad person. I feel sad now.

Pred 21 uro
Doucheous 1
Doucheous 1

The quality of these videos have really gone up since I used to watch a few years ago

Pred dnevom
Leslie Wright
Leslie Wright

I wear chucks and I ain’t sad

Pred dnevom
desi taetae
desi taetae

Geet - Jab we met

Pred dnevom
desi taetae
desi taetae

Akira - Jab tak hai jaan

Pred dnevom
Riordan
Riordan

Zoey Deschanel is the only one I want❤️

Pred dnevom
Christian V-H
Christian V-H

The only "quirky" girl that I think was well executed, written out, played etc.. is Luna Lovegood.

Pred dnevom
Tomaž Golub
Tomaž Golub

A cool video... I would only like to point out, that summer (and neither Holly golightly) for two reasons... For two reasons actually... They have their own inner world and its not all about the guy... Especially Holly Golightly... She has her own troubles and her inner obstacles to overcome... Summer doesn't change Tom... He changes himself after they break up... She's at first presented as such, because that's the way Tom sees her... Because that's the way he projects his idea of finding "the one"

Pred dnevom
Charudhi Giridhar
Charudhi Giridhar

And of course the third type - Wattpad

Pred dnevom
Belle Soares
Belle Soares

I hate it when movies make women the “cure” for a dudes sad sad life, like????????? Get a therapist you weirdo

Pred dnevom
The Diva Demon
The Diva Demon

that image is also sooo negative... it reinforces the “i am different from the other girls” thing

Pred dnevom
Lauren Mungaray
Lauren Mungaray

7:44 Her voice sounds terrible.

Pred 2 dnevi
Gail Lewis
Gail Lewis

It's unethical for counselors to date their clients, but dating someone who is expected to fix their partner is okay? Actually, no. Go get therapy, then date someone else.

Pred 2 dnevi
Aurora Herheim Gabrielsen
Aurora Herheim Gabrielsen

The moment you realize YOU are becoming a manic pixie dream girl I have no identity

Pred 2 dnevi
Jam Quijano
Jam Quijano

@7:09 like marriage?

Pred 2 dnevi
April Ludgate
April Ludgate

I think Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is the alternate of if the manic pixie dream girl stays in your life

Pred 2 dnevi
Maciej Piórek
Maciej Piórek

This video appeared in my life with perfect timing

Pred 3 dnevi
Pop
Pop

"Quirky" girl is just headache manifest in human form. Don't waste your time guys. Lots of normal girls out there.

Pred 3 dnevi
Ilya Kupriyanov
Ilya Kupriyanov

Dislike for the hashtag in the end of the video.

Pred 3 dnevi
Jordan Parkerson
Jordan Parkerson

How do I make this stop being my life please

Pred 3 dnevi
Benjamin Murray
Benjamin Murray

“I do whatever I want and you have to deal with it or leave” is psychotic. “I do whatever I want and you do whatever you want and we accept each other for that” is the only way I’ve ever formed a long term relationship on any level.

Pred 3 dnevi
Enzo Waltz
Enzo Waltz

Thanks, this video just clickes my mind I was feeling confused as hell with a relationship I'm in, and that's it, she's a quirky. Imma get tha hell out of this

Pred 3 dnevi
Colleen Walsh
Colleen Walsh

10 things I hate about you will never get old, I memorized her whole poem and auditioned for a play with it, I even fake cried. ✨I got the lead ✨

Pred 3 dnevi
osco4311
osco4311

This is the first commentary I've seen that points out that the manic pixie dream girl trope isn't it just unhealthy for the girl, but also demeaning to the guy.

Pred 3 dnevi
Samuel Hernandez
Samuel Hernandez

Great video. Great points. A very interesting take on this is Ruby Sparks. One of my favorite films! Paul Dano and Zoe Kazan.

Pred 4 dnevi
Lea Rahel
Lea Rahel

The new Netflix series Dash & Lily kind of fits in this trope but in the end they are eachother's mpdg/b. But Dash def is the sad boy in the beginning

Pred 4 dnevi
ANNIYYAHH Hood
ANNIYYAHH Hood

I've realized that a lot of my boyfriends first liked me because i fit the trope of "manic pixie dream girl" but I never liked that they didn't think of me too far past me being unpredictable or doing what I want. It's dehumanizing to do so because every relationship always ends with them claiming I'm not who I said I was or some bullshit like that, and it got to the point where I refuse to watch movies with that trope

Pred 4 dnevi
Georgia Stavs
Georgia Stavs

summer is not an example of a manic pixie dream girl, that totally misses the point of 500 days of summer

Pred 4 dnevi
Ghastly Ghost19
Ghastly Ghost19

I'm so freaking lonely

Pred 4 dnevi
ZIGOLO
ZIGOLO

One of the only movies that took that trope and broke it apart, twisted it and spited out an actual human was Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind. On the other hand Scott Pilgrim vs the world whilst being a fun movie is one of the biggest offenders of this trope.

Pred 4 dnevi
Faith Richardson
Faith Richardson

2:41 me when i say a joke and no one laughs

Pred 4 dnevi
Janky Shack
Janky Shack

I was going to give this a thumbs up until the end when I saw the #blm tag.

Pred 4 dnevi
carbonated water
carbonated water

I never saw correctly categorized Stargirl and these girls and characters in books that I absolutely hated, and now I know what they are called. Your video has fixed an internal conflict and hatred that I have toward these books and movies because I could never understand what the initial problem in the relationship was.

Pred 5 dnevi
Kebbe San
Kebbe San

Dated a quirky girl for a year. She was really loving, but at the same time really selfish. I never understood why she seemed that way while being so jolly and friendly. The fact is, she didn’t really care about people’s feelings and only though about her own fun, and her fun was being with friends and such. We broke up, she dated a friend of mine, cheated on him, but she was and is still quirky and attentive in a way. It’s toxic honestly, don’t date those people, just befriend them

Pred 5 dnevi
Branson Ritter
Branson Ritter

I think Bridge to Terrabithia is a great example of this.

Pred 5 dnevi
Almost Butnotquite
Almost Butnotquite

alternative title: video my friend sent me to prove that i am a manic pixie dream girl 🤭

Pred 5 dnevi
Carson Kay
Carson Kay

Moody dudes really out there thinking every girl that genuinely enjoys being herself is there for them. She's not talking to you because she's into you, Garrett, she's just trying to be friendly because as soon as you McFreakin' lose it, she's not gonna be the first one on your radar.

Pred 5 dnevi
Sophia Simmons
Sophia Simmons

Also, men have agency and need to be responsible for communicating how they are feeling. They need to come to a relationship with something to offer- even if its good empathy, listening skills, or anything else, but he cannot and should not be so broken as to be a second job for the woman.

Pred 5 dnevi
Poet Villanueva
Poet Villanueva

Real girls are themselves.... in the shape of their society tho

Pred 6 dnevi
Ancile
Ancile

I dated a MPDG in college. Lasted 3 weeks. It gets old really fast. They do not make good "partners" in life.

Pred 6 dnevi
Matheus Schaefer
Matheus Schaefer

As everyone here said, no one can fix another person. We are all glitched anyway and only ourselves can patch it. Live life and be happy.

Pred 6 dnevi
Ezra MAYAN
Ezra MAYAN

The Disney adaptation of Star Girl did not do the movie justice.Like, what, she’s a freak for wearing pastels? Also, I thought Leo sucked. Kevin was cool tho

Pred 6 dnevi
Allan99
Allan99

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind ez pz

Pred 6 dnevi
zozola zofia
zozola zofia

why did they want to change buddy from that 70s show...

Pred 6 dnevi
tamir Zhir
tamir Zhir

OMG!! I'm the quirky girl!!

Pred 6 dnevi
i am unfunny
i am unfunny

honestly if there were any manic pixie dream girls i doubt they'd be so interested and invested in the sad boring boy unless he actually does something to attract her.

Pred 6 dnevi
FEnCSERX
FEnCSERX

You have discovered that society has grown to despise the concept self sufficient masculinity that isn’t coming from a superhero or criminal

Pred 6 dnevi
Aki Aoryuu
Aki Aoryuu

Bridge To Terabithia anyone?

Pred 7 dnevi
CamiTheWitch
CamiTheWitch

"And by younger I mean up until a couple of years ago" Mood

Pred 7 dnevi
NightmareX123
NightmareX123

This really affected me to my core... Please make more of these

Pred 7 dnevi
Michael Peake
Michael Peake

"Is she gonna remember I exist today?" Oof. Felt that one.

Pred 7 dnevi
REALworldHISTORY
REALworldHISTORY

Things just started to makes sense

Pred 7 dnevi
Jesus rocks
Jesus rocks

You should collab with the take

Pred 7 dnevi
Don Z
Don Z

This pattern that you have noticed is hundreds of years old. Look at Beauty and the Beast for example. That film is based on a older play (1800s ish I think) which is based on even older fairy tails, with roughly the same basic plot. There are any versions. But it's old. The meaning of it from my understanding is that most men use the image of female perfection to motivate themselves; even if it's just in their head. Why am I here commenting on this video again?

Pred 7 dnevi
Mande Gianfala
Mande Gianfala

I was happy and excited at the oil change place and instead of getting an admirer, I got screwed out of $70 and an oil change. Like they literally pretended to put oil in my car. Maybe I wasn’t wearing enough toddler clothes idk

Pred 7 dnevi
eqyqtian !
eqyqtian !

I m p o r t a n t ! !

Pred 8 dnevi
Denise Hansen
Denise Hansen

Enter - “Dash and Lily” on Netflix. Perfect example of the trope.

Pred 8 dnevi
pop rocks
pop rocks

MAKE MORE OF THESE I BEG OF YOU PLEASE

Pred 8 dnevi
Nadah _xo
Nadah _xo

This vedio kinda sums up "paper Town "

Pred 8 dnevi
noah hager
noah hager

I know a manic pixie dream girl but less pixie and more war god

Pred 8 dnevi
ᴡʜɪᴛɴᴇʏ ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟ
ᴡʜɪᴛɴᴇʏ ᴄʀʏsᴛᴀʟ

Me: oh my god it’s twilight. 2 seconds later: for example twilight Me: I called! I called it!

Pred 9 dnevi
Rodrigo Soto Castro
Rodrigo Soto Castro

I would say it's all about the Hot/Crazy scale

Pred 9 dnevi
Gamerdweeb Entertainment
Gamerdweeb Entertainment

Reasons I don't think there's such thing as love... -.-' Just a pick a woman you're compatible with and win-win... but GL finding compatible woman if your expectations are too high. Teamwork makes the dream work.

Pred 9 dnevi
Amelie Somme
Amelie Somme

It's dépend on what is the purpose of the relationship, sometimes the purpose is only the relationship to feel the "electricity of love" but yeah if you want a relationship more secure, good for both people it's good too! But it's not what movies show us :/ And a lot of people, like me, want to have relationship just for the passion, and the unique story we get. I'm working on myself too think love morr like a good and calm relationship. Aha

Pred 8 dnevi
s t ._ r m a n
s t ._ r m a n

Bridge to Terabithia ! :)

Pred 9 dnevi
E A
E A

Omfg what a bloody brilliant analysis. At the end you just described the last girl I was with and her current boyfriend, the kind of behaviour she always practices and the feelings she arouses, that led me to take her out of my life. Seriously man, this is unbelievably accurate

Pred 9 dnevi
Commander Bly
Commander Bly

0:56 why the hell do I really love that poster at the back omg

Pred 9 dnevi
polymer Horse
polymer Horse

John Green said what?

Pred 9 dnevi
Dws974
Dws974

You talk about those kind of movies... remind me of how much i loved the tv show Pushing daisies :O

Pred 9 dnevi
Tooploop
Tooploop

oh no there are definately girls like this, they're usually instagram influencers or socialites

Pred 9 dnevi
BOOM REACTION1305
BOOM REACTION1305

what are you trying to say bruh!

Pred 9 dnevi
anna okafor
anna okafor

alex spoke FACTS this whole video. its nice to know that i am subscribed to a smart "youtuber"

Pred 9 dnevi
VenneltheGreat
VenneltheGreat

this shit been goin on since romeo and juliet, literally romeo is sad coz he got rejected by a girl he liked, and then he meet juliet, who's trying to defy her family's expectations. only in R&J, they both die (and one way or another get other people around them killed) because they're dumb kids. and that was supposed to be a comedy. so me thinks that shit had been going on WAY longer before then, as a story type.

Pred 9 dnevi
River Roberts
River Roberts

Just a fantastic video that really made me rethink my own ideals and fantasies. Thanks, Alex Meyers for making me realize I don't wanna be with the manic pixie dream girl.

Pred 9 dnevi
Anonymouse 777
Anonymouse 777

I feel like both ppl in the manic pixie dream girl relationship are struggling with issues that possibly require a therapist or professional. One (usu the guy) is probably struggling some sort of anxiety or depression that makes them unhealthily dependent on the other, and the other (usu the girl) is also probably dealing with something similar, or some unresolved trauma or attachment disorder that leaves them unable to fully comprehend the emotions involved in a relationship. Idk for sure tho.

Pred 9 dnevi
Bagi Dewan
Bagi Dewan

8:04 Now that looks scary

Pred 10 dnevi
Susan Evangeline
Susan Evangeline

I was such a manic pixie dream girl.. up until I was 21.. now I'm an introvert who can't even text her friends back due to anxiety .. Yup life happened

Pred 10 dnevi
Митцуку
Митцуку

poser

Pred 4 dnevi
RAFAEL APOLLO
RAFAEL APOLLO

You mean anime waifus?

Pred 10 dnevi
Noob Noob
Noob Noob

Yeah I just need a girl to fix my life. What a toxic representation of relationships. Don't expect the girl/boy like that fix you. And don't wait for "the one". Please wake up. You only need yourself

Pred 10 dnevi
Succulent Nostril
Succulent Nostril

Enkidu gets civilized

Pred 10 dnevi
kristina b
kristina b

summer wasn’t really a manic pixie dream girl, tom just viewed her as one

Pred 10 dnevi
Pain
Pain

is anyone else reaching their 30s and still haven't been in a relationship or found love :/

Pred 10 dnevi
Ana Lorena
Ana Lorena

Five minutes into this video and now I need a rewrite of Twilight where Edward is a manic pixie dream (guy) and Bella is a Sad (Girl)

Pred 10 dnevi
funky_space_panda
funky_space_panda

IM FUCKING QURIKY I SWEAR

Pred 10 dnevi
Elite Teutonic Knight
Elite Teutonic Knight

As long as this "girls can (and has to) fix any sad/bad boy" trope exists, more and more young girls will be lead into toxic or even abusive relationships, while on the same time decent guys get friendzoned and have to watch their crushes being (ab)used. Also more and more guys will be raised as a "nice guy" who thinks that *just* being nice is a full personality profile that makes every girl fall for them if they are just persistent enough. This is why i actually think movies like Twilight, 50 Shades of Grey but also most of those teen romcoms are unironically harmful to minors and young adults. The illusion and fetishes they are idealizing just screws with the expectations young people have for relationships. It also dosen't help that most of the time actors are (obviously) exceptional good looking which also leads to unrealistic superficial expectations. People (especially young people) need to discover their feelings and preferences on their own on natural bases, without those unrealistic influences - but i guess thats impossible within our modern society.

Pred 11 dnevi
DeathsGambit
DeathsGambit

I read the Tittle wrong 💦

Pred 11 dnevi
Nina Murphy
Nina Murphy

I feel like 500 days of summer is one of the most misinterpreted movies ever. The movie is not about a manic pixie dream girl, but about how Tom is viewing a three-dimensional person in a one-dimensional way. For example in one scene she is sharing very personal and vulnerable feelings with Tom and the narration is something like: “...and Tom knew he was the first person to hear this...” He’s not actually paying attention to anything she’s doing or saying, he’s just thinking something along the lines of: “Wow, I unlocked the backstory. I’m in for sure now!” It’s clear that Summer is a deeper and more complex character, and Tom barely pays attention to her. The problem is not with Summer, but with Tom. He chooses to view her the way he wants to. He’s not in love with her, he’s in love with the idea of her.

Pred 11 dnevi
my account got deleted
my account got deleted

This reminds me too much of ruby sparks

Pred dnevom
Heyyyits Bell
Heyyyits Bell

well said and very interesting. i might have to watch that movie

Pred 3 dnevi
kshamwhizzle
kshamwhizzle

exactly. Joseph Gordon Levitt himself has said multiple times that Tom isn't a hero, he isn't to be admired, he's actually a jerk.

Pred 3 dnevi
Sophie
Sophie

The film is about manic pixie dream girls. Exactly as you described, Tom makes her into a manic pixie dream girl, when really she’s a full human being. It shows the problems with the trope

Pred 4 dnevi
-Indicudi-
-Indicudi-

It’s an anti-romcom that calls out the immaturity of the manic panic pixie dream girl trope and how romance movies and tv shows give people an unrealistic expectation of relationships. He thought Summer would make his boring life worth living and make him be a better person and pursue his dreams. His view was selfish and childish because it was one dimensional. He only begins to grow out of it once he decides to better his life for himself and not because of some girl that he’s infatuated witho

Pred 5 dnevi
Johnny
Johnny

E

Pred 11 dnevi
Johanna Janiszewski
Johanna Janiszewski

Have you seen "Harold & Maude"? Manic pixie dream girl, but old. When I was younger, I always wanted to become a person like Maude. Or did you watch Dharma and Greg? It's not actually a teen show, but oh dear, its "Manic Pixie Dream Girl: the series"

Pred 11 dnevi

Naprej

AFTER is the dumbest movie I've ever seen...

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